Thursday, May 21, 2009

So long...and the same lesson learned.

Well first of all, I can't believe that it has been so long since I posted. Wow, time flies.


I am not the most stubborn person in the world, maybe not even the most stubborn one in my house. :) I have learned a lesson in disappointment, again. I like to think that I have figured some of this out by now, but I guess we never stop learning - even if it's the same lesson over again.


We were in Minneapolis last week for my daughter's annual check-up at Children's hospital. She was born with a small jaw and had to have surgery when she was two weeks old. We have gone back for these annual check-ups ever since. Our expectation was that this check up would go as the previous ones have - "she's perfect, see you next year!" (we even suspected that this would be her last check-up - "she's perfect, have a nice life!")


The check-up consists of one doctor after the other throughout the morning, lunch, and then a consult with the whole team of docs in the afternoon. So through out the morning we saw each of the docs and instead of coasting through, we got one bit of disappointing news after the other.


To summarize the visit: she has minor hearing loss in her left ear, and they have no idea why. They will look into it further when we go back later this summer. And she is not able to close her airway in her speech. She will need surgery to help her keep air escaping through her nasal passage. This too will be done later this summer.


I didn't realize at first how disappointed I was. It wasn't until I shared the news that the emotions came and revealed the fact that I was not ok with these developments. I should say that I had a similar experience after her birth. I knew that God was able to heal her, and that if He would, the doctors and "experts" would have no choice but to acknowledge His power.


What I didn't realize was that what he had in mind was for me. By going through the experience of surgery, hospital stays, lost wages, etc., I had no choice but to acknowledge God's provision. He cared for us in every way possible. The lesson was for us, not the experts.


Obviously I had learned that God will take care of us. So imagine my surprise when disappointment reared its head again last week. I am certain that God has something in store...one of us needs to learn a lesson: me, Heather, our other kids, the experts, or maybe someone I will never know of.


And you know what, that's ok. We have claimed all along that we are at God's disposal and for his pleasure. Now is the part where we live it. I would obviously prefer that my daughter not have to go through another surgery (the other day we were talking about the surgery at dinner and she asked what she would do if she got scared this time - ouch), but I am sure of God's hand and his ability to care for her through whatever he calls her to.


So come what may, we are thankful for how God will choose to use it to reveal himself to one of us. And Sammy is created by His hand, just as he intended...
"She is perfect! Have a nice life."

2 comments:

Foxy Lady said...

Beautifully said. I love you!!!

Heather said...

I agree with your bride!

Beautifully said!

I can't wait to see what God has in store for your family. I know it will be an incredible blessing.